I wrote this on the train last night going home from work. I have been dreaming of Dad for the past few nights and it seems so real seeing him there and waking up feeling so bereft knowing that it was only a dream and he's no longer here. I know he is gone but the pain is still there and I know it will be there for a long time. Most days I am great and I can think of him without feeling sad at all and can even talk about him without wanting to cry but this week for some reason it's been harder...not really sure why!
In My Dreams
In my dreams I see you there…
Just out of Reach.
You smile, you wave and you open your mouth to speak
But I can hear no words and I struggle to listen.
Your lips move, soundlessly telling me you love us and miss us and are sorry you had to leave us.
I reach out, my arms wide, to hug you but you turn and move away…looking behind you as you leave and mouthing the words “Goodbye, love”
…And then you are gone and my pillow is soaked with tears of frustration and sadness that I have lost you again…
Until tomorrow night when I will see you again…
...In my dreams.
© Fiona Teale 2009
4 comments:
thats a beautiful poem.love toni
Lovely. I dreamed of Carol a lot after she died, and of Glenn too. I wonder sometimes if it isn't their way of telling us they are okay, or is it us working out our grief?
It is hard, but someone once told me, we don't cry for them that have died, we cry for ourselves who are left behind.
So, I try not to be selfish and cry for myself, but to smile and remember the life they shared with us.
Sometimes it works...
*secike*. Hope. nothing comes to mind!
(nice to see Toni reads your blogg too! Shaz reads mine but it won't let her leave a comment anymore, stupid thing)
xxx
Yes it is true...I do cry for me and what I am missing...I'm happy too because dad was ready to go and he wasn't afraid but was sad for us I think...I know wherever he is, he is well... I guess there are still so many things I want to say and do for him but can't but we do smile and laugh about the good times...
On something completely different, I'd love to recommend something but I don't know what you like. You've got a couple of authors there whose books I haven't read and wouldn't likely to be reading either. Wait, I take that back. I've read one of Janet's books and enjoyed it. Have you tried The Red Tent? Don't remember the author now, but I did enjoy that one. Not new release though....
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