Building Bridges....

...is my theme for this week. I don't know if it is because I am getting older or what but I have suddenly decided that life is too short for petty grievances and all the silly things that people get their knickers in a twist over. Of course there are some not-so-silly things that upset people and I have a couple of those but I am willing to live and let live and it's time some people get off their high horse and learn to forgive.

I guess I got to thinking about it all last week when I was feeling very down and thinking way too much. It's always a bad thing when I think too much. I am a very sensitive type person and I tend to think about regrets, and trust me I have had a few! The majority of the regrets are things that were my fault. I am big enough a person to own these things and to acknowledge that I brought some things on myself. I have spent my life trying to be a good person, or at least the best person I can be. Sometimes situations arise where I am not a nice person but that is something I have learnt to live with. It's not a deliberate thing and hey...who's perfect eh? Anyone who says they are is a liar in my book.

Anyway...Bridge No. 1. Last week I made contact with a dear friend who I haven't had much contact with in close to 6 years. We worked together in our last job and became very close friends. When Andrea and her boyfriend moved into a house near ours, MM and I made up a huge grocery basket of goodies for them and the kids because they were struggling and doing it pretty tough. We all got on great. Her kids were the greatest and well Andrea and I were like soul mates. We both had to endure the office bitches at our old job who were making life hell for a lot of the staff and Andrea and I were the only two who stood up to them and well, they made our life even more hell until both Andrea and I quit our jobs and got the jobs we have now. Needless to say those two old OB's are still miserable where they are and Andrea and I have moved on from strength to strength. Andrea was there for me knowing how much I wanted to have kids but couldn't and just helped me through a lot of personal stuff.

Then one day we just stopped talking to each other. For no real reason except our lives both went for a turn in a different direction. Andrea and her boyfriend split. Then one day out of the blue she announced she found someone new and was pregnant. It shocked me beacuase she always swore she would never have more kids and it was one of the reasons she and the old boyfriend split because he wanted kids (he had none) and she didn't want more. So I think, if I was honest with myself, I distanced myself from her because she was having the very thing I really wanted at the time. A baby. Definately not her fault but not something I could deal with at the time. So I kept making excuses and we just eventually went our separate ways. She found me on Facebook eventually and we started chatting again until last week I decided enough was enough. I had to make amends and it turned out that for the last 6 years we have been working in the same street and never knew it! How we never ran into each other I'll never know. But tomorrow (Monday), I have arranged for us to have lunch together and finally catch up. A few weeks ago she and her now husband moved 2 streets away from us as well which I never knew but it explains the car that always beeped when it drove past! So hopefully we can get this friendship back on track. I'm not proud of myself for being that way with her and I even admitted to her that was the reason I stopped seeing her. But the loyal friend that she is actually blamed herself! She said she had a feeling when she told me she was pregnant that she could have done it in a better way because she realised it would hurt me. And she never held it against me. She always knew when I was ready we would talk again. And I am glad that I did it! So the lesson here is that a true friend will take the good with the bad and they never give up on each other.

Bridge No. 2 - Eldest stepdaughter. Now I know I have told you about how MM had cut daughter No.1 from his life and we just found out she just got engaged to the Dick from Hell who is currently working in Darwin for the next 6 months leaving Daughter 1 at home by herself. I haven't told my MM yet but I decided to message her on Facebook just to congratulate her on her engagement because to be honest I am tired of the two of them being so stubborn. There is a lot of anger and hate there still although MM occasionally will reminisce about this daughter as she was always daddy's girl and he will pop up with a story about the two of them when she was smaller. I thought she would ignore me because I removed her from my friends list 2 years ago after Dad's funeral because she got drunk just after it and was sprouting all kinds of rubbish on Facebook and I had to remove her from mum's Facebook account as well because poor mum definately didn't need to hear the crap she was going on with. At the time I wrote her a nasty message in her inbox telling her to get over herself and to leave us alone etc. And that was the last we heard from her.

To my surprise I got a nice message back a couple of days ago and we chatted again about the last two years. She refuses to talk about her father and when ever I try to bring him into a conversation she changes the subject. She is aware I cannot stand Freak Boy. In fact none of MM's family like him at all because he is sullen and just won't speak. She can do so much better than him. But that's her problem. I'm hoping, once I tell MM, that I can organise a coffee date or something like we used to in the old days. She is so much like her mother...she loves playing the part of the victim and I wish she could see past all that and realise what she would miss if her dad was to be no longer around.

Anyway that's my week thus far in a nutshell. The weekend I spent cleaning out the office and filing (yuk!) and I have a desk again! Yay! Now the accountant will have some spare space to work on when she comes in this week to do the BAS for MM. She wants to retire some time soon and she will be teaching me how to use MYOB and do the BAS each quarter. It's not hard as I have done it before but it's been a while!

Anyway everyone have a great week! Sorry for the yawn fest but there is just not much excitement in this here neck of the woods!